Most of the stress that has kept me off of this blog has had to do with work. The kids have played their part but the work thing has been a huge pain in the ass.
Three years ago I was in a bad place at work and I wound up moving to another job. I loved the job I left but it had become unbearable to work there due to all the issues with employees and an absentee boss. I was literally working 60 hours a week and doing three peoples jobs. I was so depressed I thought I was worthless and I questioned every move that I made. So I made a promise to myself that I would never again allow myself to be pushed into that type of hole.
Last December things got difficult at my current job. My boss pulled me in a room and gave me an off the books reprimand that was to be placed on the books if I continued to misbehave. The reprimand was so absurd that I asked for another individual to come in and witness the conversation. Basically I was told I wasn’t allowed to do anything without permission, all my responsibilities were removed, and I was told I was portraying a negative perception to other employees inside and outside my branch. It was ridiculous!
I admit that I was having problems with attendance due to stress at home and healthcare issues. However at work I had been told to train two new individuals who never should have been hired. These individuals were never told that they HAD to train with me so I couldn’t force them to sit with me or learn. I was held responsible for their lack of training and their lack of progress. When I spoke with my boss about it he either blew it off or said oh well if they don’t want to train we will just load them up with work and when they fail we will fire them. I hated that answer but I wasn’t the boss so I backed off. There was a whole bunch of crap with hiring issues and people getting screwed out of jobs. I was the voice of reason, I was the one telling people it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. I was the one calming down the co-worker who was about to go overboard about it.
Anyway after I was basically told to sit in my cubicle and not speak to anyone about anything I cut off contact with everyone around me. I answered work related questions only if I couldn’t defer them to my supervisor and I exchanged pleasantries only if required. Needless to say I was nothing like myself. My coworkers who weren’t aware of my reprimand thought I was being a bitch. I didn’t speak to them unless spoken to and when I did I said as little as possible. The very few individuals I knew on a personal basis were given a short statement letting them know I didn’t feel I could speak to them without reprimand. Nothing was explained to anyone except for one coworker who I spoke with outside the office.
Not long after that I found a new job. My boss released me to go to it and then apparently attempted to get my coworkers to do some sort of going away party. I flat out told the one coworker/friend I was speaking with to tell them all I did not want a party. At some point my friend was told by another coworker that they didn’t want to do a party because they thought I hated them. My friend knew that wasn’t true and that I was only avoiding them in hopes of keeping them from being drawn into the drama. She had me and the coworker meet in the break room away from my boss to discuss the issues.
I explained the issues and reassured them I didn’t hate them.
She then told me that my boss had pulled her and all the other employees in an office and told them I hated them!
I couldn’t believe it. This full grown man had pulled in my coworkers and told them I hated them! What the hell are we teenagers? I don’t even have to like the people I work with to work effectively with them. Plus I didn’t hate any of them. I disliked one of them but that was simply because he disliked me and made sure I knew it. I had never been disrespectful to any of them and had always treated them with respect. But for some reason he felt it necessary to tell them something mean so that I would be even more isolated.
Once again I was in that hole! The despair was horrible. People who knew my work was excellent would come to me for support and I would have to turn them away. Customers that could have been taken care of in a matter of minutes were rerouted to other employees simply because I was afraid to assist them without instruction. I felt helpless and worthless all over again!
When I moved to my new job I vowed to make sure this all came to light. I had wanted to file a complaint all along but was afraid of reprimand while I was in my old office. So when I made it to my new job I attempted to file a complaint but was told I had missed the 45 day window to do so. I know a lot of people probably thought I was filing the complaint for my own benefit but my concern was for my coworkers. One of them was sure to be next and I didn’t want anyone to ever feel the way I had.
One of old coworkers got her reprimand this week. She is a 30+ year employee with an incredible work record. He wrote her up for calling in sick!
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